Let's Hear It For The Roses!

My roses are in bloom. Amazing.

I'd always thought roses were little sissies that had to be coddled and coaxed into growing. Not these guys. They hang tough in my survival-of-the-fittest garden.

They're planted in soil made up of clay and rocks. The rain here comes four inches at a time, if it comes at all, and the clumpy dirt retains no moisture. It's not a problem.

Every May these roses strut their stuff like a troupe of Las Vegas showgirls. Sadly, by July they are nothing but bare stalks.

I think I shall go outside and enjoy my roses before the deer do.

A Few Short Words on Verbosity

Verbosity is my middle name, so I'll make this long. Just kidding.

For years I have blithely claimed to be verbose. Today I decided to look up some synonyms for that wonderful trait.

Windiness, long-winded, redundancy. Yikes!

That's what I've been telling everyone? What're the antonyms?

Conciseness, laconic.

I like those better. From now on I'll be laconic, short-winded, admired by one and all for my succinct, pithy...damn! I'm doing it again.

Communicating Clearly

Okay, I know I tend to go on about this, but I saw a hand-lettered sign posted in the window of a storefront church. It said: What if it true?

What if what true?

The Martians have landed? The fork ran away with the spoon?

Next time I'm near that church I'm going to knock on the door and demand an explanation.

Bad, Badder, Baddest

My writing group of two, Loree Burns and Eric Luper, have finished critiquing my novel. They have offered their usual wonderful insights and suggestions which I intend to incorporate into the next draft.

I had hoped the novel would fall into the young adult category. It does not. It's kind of liberating. I can now fully unharness my dark side, dust off some choice swear words (joke - they don't need dusting) and get some of my characters off their passive butts and into really hot water.

I simply must spice things up. No, it won't be heaving bosoms or throbbing manhood. It'll be something much better than that - violence. Just a tad.

I also need to add a new element of surprise. Dr. Luper was not impressed with my who-dunnit angle, so I'm going to twist it around so that even he, great sleuth and guesser-of-endings will be caught off guard.

Now, how to make a surly, snarky individual into someone Dr. Burns will like from the get-go. Groan. Sigh. That is my biggest challenge.

Writing bad guys is so much easier than writing good guys.

And the Answer Is...

When I get to heaven I have three questions I'm going to ask:

1. What happened to Amelia Earhart?

2. Who was behind the grassy knoll when President Kennedy got shot?

3. What does this slogan, posted in the window of a beauty salon, mean?

"Yesterdays hair is tomorrows trend"